To my darling Grace,
As I write this, I sit with you hiccuping and dancing inside me with a flood of love bursting from my heart. You and I have already developed a special connection, even though we can’t see each other yet. You really love when I meditate and do my breathwork, I think because you can feel the calm of my heartbeat and your cozy wombspace expands for you to stretch out.
You also respond to my voice and your dad’s with so much animation. When I sing you grow still, but when I finish you wiggle like you want to hear more. I sing “Amazing Grace” most often to you because, to me, it’s already your song. You are already amazing to me, and the words speak truth to my core – you and what your name means to me brings me home in a way I can’t explain.
I can already tell you’re going to be such a daddy’s girl, too. When your dad talks to you, one of two things happens: if you were just doing your usual somersaults, as soon as you hear his voice and feel his hand on you, you slow down and come to rest; and if you were just resting, as soon as you hear his voice you move towards him. The sparkle in your dad’s eyes and smile when you and he interact is unlike anything I’ve seen on his face in the fourteen years I’ve known him, and it makes me love you both even more.
My pregnancy with you, although certainly a life-changingly weird experience, has been the most organic, natural, divinely blessed journey I could have imagined. At every doctor and midwife appointment, words like “perfect,” “beautiful,” “gorgeous” are universally used to describe your strong heart, your growth, and even your little button nose. You are already perfectly created and radiant with beauty to all who witness you, including and especially to me and your dad.
I told Dad earlier in my pregnancy, when I started to really feel your presence in me that I could feel your strong will and power. I know from just your presence that you possess a determination and wisdom that will inspire and teach us both for the rest of our lives. Not to mention your dance moves are already a delight. I can’t wait to see you shimmy and shine.
I have a few promises I want to make to you as your mama that you can always hold me to.
I promise to love you and trust you, so that you may grow in love and trust in yourself and others.
I promise to talk to you in such a way that you will listen, and I promise to listen to you in such a way that you will talk.
I promise to respect you for who you authentically are, and I will help you learn to respect others for who they are.
I promise to encourage you to ask questions and seek answers from within you and from the wonderful world around you.
I promise to show you the infinite beauty in this world and life, and I will teach you to create it yourself.
I promise to guide you with love and grace, rather than control and punishment.
I promise to teach you, and I promise to learn from you.
I promise to provide opportunities and resources for you to courageously grow in your purpose and follow your joy, and I promise to support your freedom to pave your own path.
I love you, sweet Grace. I’m proud of you, and I will cherish the gift of being your mother forever.
Endless love,
Mama